妈妈。

Elena wears a Muumuu jumpsuit and Ozma of California scarf. Nova and Wynter wear Bobo Choses. ">

“我们的房子真的很幸运。旧金山湾区的房地产市场简直是疯了!当我发现自己怀上了我们的第二个孩子诺瓦时，我们决定开始寻找我们的第一个家庭住宅。我们在西奥克兰的一套不到900平方英尺(约合457平方米)的阁楼里住了大约10年。我们本来没打算在那里待那么久，但我们不得不一直等，直到我们有了一个好地方，可以出售和购买新房子。在怀了温特之后，我们已经感觉到了压力，所以我们知道第二个孩子即将出生，我们需要更多的空间!我们去年九月把阁楼卖了，十月份就搬进来了!这只是我们去的另一个开放日，我们都觉得这是对我们来说是正确的，当我们走进去的时候。这是我们第一次出价买房子，我们买下了!这么说吧，之前的房主都是很好的正派人! They really wanted us to have their home."

艾琳娜穿着穆穆袍连身裤和加利福尼亚州的Ozma围巾。诺瓦和温特穿着波波的选择．

"We live in the Maxwell Park area of East Oakland, in a 1930’s Mediterranean-style home. It was a flip a few years back and we plan on restoring some of its original character, along with updating and remodeling a few of the rooms. Depending on how long we plan on staying here, we may even eventually add on to it, as well. We were told Maxwell Park is the very first 'established' neighborhood here in Oakland, and no two homes look alike. And I have to say, we love our neighborhood! Our neighbors are amazing! It’s a mix of young families and older residents who have lived here for like 50 years or more! The day we moved in everyone introduced themselves, offered a helping hand, and welcomed us to the neighborhood. There were even kids who had a lemonade stand two houses down the day we moved in! It was very surreal. We were so used to people keeping to themselves and not really interacting with one another. This is a new way of living for us, actually talking to our neighbors, saying 'hi,' and inviting each other over for birthday parties. It has been really nice. Everyone really looks out for one another here. We feel extremely fortunate."

"Modern. Vintage. Comfortable. We love mid-century modern furniture. Who doesn’t right? But I have been acquiring and selling it for about 15 years now. I’ve had to sell pieces as I’ve moved through the years, and admittedly there are a few that I regret not holding onto. Mid-century furniture wasn’t as coveted and as expensive as it is today, but I still love trying to find pieces for a bargain. They’ve been harder to come by, but I love the hunt! Flea markets, thrift stores, yard sales—I’m all about them!"

“我希望我有一个!”人们总是认为我很擅长室内装饰，因为我有能力把一套衣服放在一起，因为我曾经是一个个人设计师。但我不是。我知道我喜欢什么，但我不知道如何把它们组合在一起。我倾向于把我喜欢的所有东西都放在一个房间里，然后发现里面的东西太多了!我会开始慢慢地把一些东西拿走然后在房子的其他房间里重新想象它们。如果这样做不起作用，它就会被存放在车库里，直到下一次庭院甩卖/捐赠的时候。我需要帮助!快来人帮帮我!”

everywhere. Her therapists like to (and we want them to be able to) use most of the house. Especially her physical therapist. I honestly dislike traditional children’s toys. They’re not the most beautiful things to look at. And they’re usually extremely bright, plastic, and gigantic! And wouldn’t you know, Nova’s favorite 'toy' is a HUMONGOUS, bright plastic bouncer!" ">

“我想说，我把他们所有的东西都放在一个房间或一个地方，但我一直很不成功。当我们搬进这所房子的时候，我想象着温特和诺瓦只是在他们的房间里玩耍，也许出于必要在客厅里放一篮子玩具。这显然不是事实，也不现实!尤其是温特的治疗，我们有她的东西到处．她的治疗师喜欢（我们希望他们能够）使用大部分房子。特别是她的物理治疗师。我真的不喜欢传统的儿童玩具。他们不是最美丽的样子。他们通常非常明亮，塑料和巨大！难道你不知道，新星最喜欢的“玩具”是一个谦虚，明亮的塑料保镖！“

Audrey Bodisco. Before having my babies I had always been a modest person. Never really wanting to show too much skin, dressing pretty conservatively because of my own insecurities about my body. But after having my babies, I would whip my boob out if I needed to! There’s no time for being shy when you have a hungry baby! I still dress pretty conservatively, but that’s more out of my preference of style than anything. Becoming a mother has allowed me to embrace my body and see it in a whole new light. Women are unbelievably amazing beings! Our bodies provide life and nourishment. It’s an absolutely beautiful thing! No matter what size, shape, or color! And that’s what that painting represents to me. It’s about embracing the beauty and power of a woman’s body." ">

“我有一些很喜欢的家具，它们给我留下了美好的回忆，但不幸的是，后来我把它们卖掉了。自从我们搬进这个我喜欢的、对我来说很特别的房子后，我买了一些艺术品和家具。一个是“乳房”绘画奥黛丽·博迪斯科．在拥有我的婴儿之前，我一直是一个适度的人。从来没有真正想要展示过多的皮肤，因为我对我的身体的不安全感而保守敷料。但是在拥有我的婴儿之后，如果我需要，我会鞭打我的胸部！当你有一个饥饿的宝宝时，没有时间害羞！我仍然保守漂亮，但这更偏离风格的偏好而不是什么。成为一位母亲让我拥抱我的身体并在一个全新的光线中看到它。妇女是令人难以置信的令人惊叹的生物！我们的机构提供了生活和营养。这是一个绝对美丽的事情！ No matter what size, shape, or color! And that’s what that painting represents to me. It’s about embracing the beauty and power of a woman’s body."

Deb Heyrana. It’s of Wynter with her dinosaur. She loves dinosaurs. I literally cried when I opened it. I was so overwhelmed with gratitude and it touched my heart so deeply. She even included a little bit of me in the painting by adding an Ace & Jig textile and using a specific color palette. I think it’s the most thoughtful gift I’ve ever received." ">

“最近我是我非常亲爱的朋友的画作，德莱纳．这是温特和她的恐龙的照片。她喜欢恐龙。我打开它的时候真的哭了。我充满了感激之情，这深深地触动了我的心。她甚至在画中加入了我的一部分ACE和JIG.纺织和使用特定的调色板。我认为这是我收到的最周到的礼物。“

Naomi Phan-Quang. She’s currently redecorating her home, and she had asked if I was interested in her wall unit. I about screamed with excitement when she texted me a photo of it. I had been trying to find one for years! I couldn’t believe she was offering it to me! It will be the center piece for our room upstairs once we get it together!" ">

“我最近还从另一个好朋友那里买了一套中世纪的墙房，拿俄米Phan-Quang．她目前正在重新装修她的家，她曾问我是否对她的墙单位感兴趣。当她向我发短信给我一张照片时，我兴奋地尖叫着。多年来一直试图找到一个！我无法相信她向我提供了！一旦我们一起获得它，它将是我们房间的中心件！“

“能够见证我的小人物成为成年人。看着他们变得更加独立，发现世界，并成为自己的人。我已经看到了他们的个性的差异。新星是非常令人观察的，可爱的，敏感的。Wynter是一个little comedian and loves making us laugh. She has the most hilarious silly faces, and a 'fake laugh' she likes to do. She’s also extremely sassy and stubborn! But it’s all good things. As frustrating as it can be, I’m so very proud of her. It’s been so interesting to watch them both form their own relationship with each other. I was raised an only child, so seeing the sibling bond/rivalry is absolutely fascinating to me!"

“确保我的孩子感受到同等的爱、价值和关怀。平衡两者的需求一直是一场斗争，当然Wynter有更多的需求，这不可避免地需要更多的关注。我丈夫和我都讨论过，随着Nova变老，有意识地与他“签到”的重要性。即使我们认为他做得很好。我明白我们怎么会认为他不那么需要我们，我们知道这不一定是真的。”

“我认为这只是一种自然的好奇心，即性别在他们的兴趣、个性、怪癖以及成年后的性格中究竟扮演了什么角色。我们想让两个孩子接触尽可能多的东西，然后让他们走在前面!无论他们的梦想和激情成为什么，我们都会110%的支持和培养他们!在生孩子的问题上，我没有偏好，但我一直知道我的第一个孩子会是女孩。我不知道为什么，但那只是我的一种感觉。在我进行试管受精的时候，我们决定晚一点再知道她的性别，但和Nova在一起时，我想马上知道她的性别。他完全出乎我的意料，当我发现他是个男孩时，我很高兴，但说实话，这对我并不重要。能有第二个孩子，我感到非常幸运。”

“温特的名字是我们名单上排名前三的名字之一。我丈夫威尔更喜欢一个，我也更喜欢另一个，而我们似乎都同样喜欢温特。她一出生，我们就决定给她取个名字。我生她的那天(提前了一个月)，我们的入院护士叫温特，在我们非常困惑和非常紧张的时候，她给我们带来了平静和光明。我们认为这是一个征兆，她是我们选择温特这个名字的最终原因。用y代替i也是威尔的主意。我知道他喜欢把功劳揽在自己身上。我承认这招很聪明。温特的中间名是日本名字“香织”，意思是强壮(指男性，身体强壮)。我想找一个表示力量的词，比如“坚强的精神”，但在日语中很难找到。 So, I just decided that Kaori would mean what I wanted it to mean, and I also love how it sounds with Wynter. Nova’s first name is all my husband’s doing. I was having the hardest time coming up with names for a boy! I could barely come up with two, while Will was constantly adding to the list and running them by me. When he asked me about Nova I wasn’t sold on it at first (it actually made me think of girl), but I asked a few friends what they thought about the name, and they absolutely loved it. So, I simmered on it and it finally grew on me, and I loved it just as much! For his middle name, Kazue, I knew I wanted to stick with a Japanese name, and was hoping to find a word or name that meant 'gift' or 'surprise,' but didn’t like how they sounded with Nova. I came across Kazue, which means blessing, and thought it was perfect! And ironically enough, Kazue, spelled with an 'e'. is intended for a female. So, both my kids have middle names intended for the opposite sex, and I’m totally ok with that."

“是的。作为独生子女，我非常想要一个大家庭!我非常希望能有兄弟姐妹一起长大，能够参加大型的家庭聚会。我也想在别人身上看到我自己。”

one more day, but please when I call you in the morning, don’t expect to hear good news.' When I got home that evening from work I told Will and I cried some more. I felt so defeated. As I sat there crying in his arms, he tells me, 'It’s ok. It wasn’t meant to be for us, and that’s ok. It can just be you, me, and a hundred cats!' He always knows how to make me laugh. Even after being told that basically this was it, and we were both heartbroken, we just weren’t quite ready to give up. That evening, we prayed (or chanted, I am a Buddhist) for a miracle! It felt like a losing battle, but I was holding onto a sliver of hope that our little embryo’s cells would split, and this wasn’t the end for us." ">

“这感觉像是很久以前的事了，又像是昨天才发生的事!”我和我的丈夫已经尝试怀孕三年了，我怀孕过两次，但两次都流产了。那段时间对我们来说真的很艰难。我记得自己感觉很失败，觉得自己出了什么问题。我也对我的丈夫感到内疚，因为我知道他有多想成为一个父亲，我知道他会是一个多么棒的父亲。我们讨论过领养，但最终决定做体外受精。我们仍然想要一个在生理上属于我们的孩子。我当时37岁，觉得这可能是我唯一一次怀孕的机会。我们听过很多夫妻在试管受精成功之前，或者根本不成功的故事。我们只负担得起一次，所以我们觉得就这样吧! The whole process of IVF was hard, physically and emotionally. I was only able to produce 10 eggs, 4 eggs fertilized, but then we were left with only one embryo. This moment will forever be ingrained in my memory. I received a call from the embryologist while I was at work, and he told me that our last embryo (that held all our hopes and dreams), its cells had stopped splitting, and it looked like this was the end of the road for us. I was absolutely devastated and heartbroken. I just sat there and cried while I held the phone to my ear. Then he says, 'I’ll give it一个更多的一天，但请在早上打电话给你时，不要指望听到好消息。当我从工作中回家时，我告诉威尔和我哭了一些。我觉得这么击败了。当我坐在那里哭着怀抱时，他告诉我，“没关系。这并不意味着我们，那没关系。它可以成为你，我和一百只猫！'他总是知道如何让我发笑。即使被告知基本上是这样的，我们都既伤心欲绝，我们既不完全没准备好放弃。那天晚上，我们祈祷（或诵经，我是一个佛教徒）奇迹！它觉得一场失败的战斗，但我正在抓住一个人希望我们的小胚胎的细胞会分裂，这不是我们的结束。“

Elena wears a Hansel from Basel dress, St. Agni sandals, and Anna Monet earrings. Wynter and Nova wear Misha + Puff. ">

“第二天早上我们得到了我们一直害怕的电话，胚胎学家（他的名字是Sergio）问道，'埃琳娜？你好吗？'我无法相信他正在谈谈。我就像，'是的，塞尔吉奥，我猜吗？“然后我听到了，“好吧，我不知道发生了什么，但细胞分裂！我们活检它，并将其发送到实验室进行测试。'我was in complete shock. I literally cried and laughed at the same time! I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and it was like my mind and my body freaked out! When we got the results back from the biopsy, it came back as 'no results.' We were confused by this, but our doctor told us this could happen. She said it can either mean the biopsy was too small to test, or that there is some sort of chromosomal 'abnormality.' It was suggested we do another round of IVF, but that was not an option for us. So, we were left with the choice of whether to implant or not. We honestly didn’t sit with this decision for very long. We felt our little embryo had fought so hard to be here, we weren’t giving up on it, and our journey wasn’t ending. We moved forward and decided to implant. Then it was the waiting game to see if it had worked and that I was indeed pregnant. It was the longest 2 weeks of my life! I had to go in on Christmas morning to take my pregnancy test! I thought for sure it hadn’t worked because I didn’t experience any of the typical pregnancy symptoms. Later that morning we got the call with the results of the pregnancy test, and the nurse told us, 'Your test result came back positive! You’re pregnant!' Tears of joy and excitement once again, but then fear eventually set in. Fear of miscarrying, and losing another baby. It was a very sensitive time, and it was hard to maintain the excitement and joy."

艾琳娜穿着汉斯从巴塞尔协议裙子，圣阿格尼凉鞋,安娜·莫奈收入。狂日和新衣服米莎+泡芙．

"That was a really hard day. I still struggle with how I felt. As my pregnancy went along, I went ahead and got prenatal testing done, I just assumed it was what you did when you’re pregnant. Especially if you were over the age of 35. The day I was given the results was one of the toughest days of my life. I was at work and stepped into the office to take the call. The nurse on the other end said, 'I’m so sorry, your test result came back positive for trisomy 21, Down syndrome.' I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I instantly felt all my hopes and dreams of becoming a mother snatched away from me. I mourned my baby before she was even born. I cried so hard. I couldn’t stop crying. I honestly hate that I felt that way. I wish I could go back to that moment and had just been excited about my pregnancy and finally becoming a mother! I feel robbed of that joy, because of what I didn’t know, but also because of how I was given the news. It had already been decided that Down syndrome was this horrible, awful thing. But I had no clue what Down syndrome meant. I only had my own assumptions. And I had my fear. My fear of the unknown, and the type of mother I could not be. I couldn’t be a 'special needs' mom. We decided to get further and more conclusive testing done. I had a CVS, which is a very painful and invasive test. If I could go back, I would have never chosen to get this done. And it was confirmed, our baby will be born with Down syndrome. We were immediately scheduled to talk with a genetics counselor, and were told about all of things are baby would never or likely won’t be able to do. Then we were presented with the option to terminate our pregnancy. And kept being reminded, 'You still have time to terminate.' It was heart-wrenching. How could we? After seeing our baby’s tiny hands and feet? Feeling her move? Seeing and hearing her heart beat? No, we couldn’t. And we wouldn’t terminate. We wanted a child so badly, and for us that meant loving and accepting the child that had chosen us to be her parents."

“是的！这是我能做的最好的事！我不想听医生、遗传学家和专家说什么。我听够了百分比和统计数字。他们不能告诉我做唐氏综合症孩子的父母到底意味着什么。他们不知道每天是什么样子，也不知道接下来的几年是什么样子。我接触的家人不需要告诉我太多，我自己去看看！社交媒体是一件有趣的事情。如果使用得当，它可以真正让一些令人惊奇的事情发生，并创造友谊和团结的真诚纽带。这些妈妈都告诉我了！好的，坏的，有趣的，令人心碎的东西。作为一个残疾孩子（或者我喜欢说的“不同的能力”）的母亲，所有这些都构成了一个残疾孩子的母亲。他们并没有用糖衣裹住它，让它看起来就像抚养一个典型的发育中的孩子一样。因为老实说，事实并非如此。是的，有相似之处，但也有明显的区别。这些女性分享了典型的身体延迟情况。例如，对于发育正常的儿童，他们通常在6-9个月大的时候开始在任何地方爬行。对于患有Ds的孩子来说，他们通常在14-18个月大的时候开始在任何地方爬行。他们分享了他们的恐惧和担忧，无论是关于健康、发展、行为、社会和情绪的起伏。这些家庭让我深受鼓舞，他们愿意与我分享，愿意向陌生人敞开心扉，这让我倍感感激和谦卑。但我从他们身上学到的最重要的一点是，他们的日常生活与任何其他家庭都非常相似。这就是我所需要的。”

“有明显的担忧，比如她的身体和精神发育。她会真正独立，还是永远和我们住在一起?人们会接受她吗?人们会怎样对待她?这可能听起来很傻，但我最大的担忧(或恐惧)之一是，我无法在温特看到自己。唐氏综合症有一些明显的身体特征，这使得患有唐氏综合症的人(但不是所有)看起来都很相似。杏仁状的眼睛，更小的鼻子，更矮的身材。我担心我只会看到综合症，而不是我的孩子。我生下温特后，感觉好麻木。我见了她一小会儿，然后她就被送去了重症监护室。 I didn’t see her for a whole day. The next morning as Will wheeled me up to the ICU to see her, I was so afraid. Afraid of what I would see and how I would feel. But once that baby girl was placed on my chest and my eyes met hers, I saw nothing but my beautiful baby, and nothing else mattered."

“有这么多!”但一个is that you can only have 'a little bit' of Down syndrome, or that there are mild and severe levels of Down syndrome. This is not true. You either have it or you don’t. There is a spectrum when it comes to each individual child’s strengths, just as there would be for typically developing children. And there are higher risks of your child having some sort of other medical concern or additional diagnosis. About 50% of all children with Down syndrome have some sort of heart defect. Wynter is apart of that 50%, but it is not severe and she is very healthy. There are different types of Down syndrome. Wynter has the most common form, which is trisomy 21, it is when you have 3 copies of chromosome 21, where typically a person would only have 2 copies of it. It accounts for about 95% of people with Ds. There is Translocation, it’s when part of chromosome 21 breaks off during cell division and attaches to another chromosome. That extra part is what causes the presence of Down syndrome, it accounts for about 4% of people with Ds. And there is also Mosaicism. This is when Nondisjunction of chromosome 21 happens in one, but not all of the cell divisions. And typically people with Mosaicism Ds don’t display all of the typical characteristics of Down syndrome, like physical features. It accounts for about 1% of people with Ds. Another misconception that drives me bonkers is that people with Ds are 'always happy.' I don’t know where this comes from. People with Down syndrome are more than capable of displaying a wide range of emotions just like you and me. Wynter has shown it all to us, her anger, her frustration, her sadness, and her joy. Oh, her joy is the absolute best emotion to witness, next to her feeling proud. The list could go on, but the best thing for people to do is to ask questions! Do their research, and stay informed. Don’t just assume, or think what you know is correct, or that there isn’t more to learn! I think it’s so important for people, especially people who do not have children or know of people with Down syndrome, to educate themselves about what Down syndrome truly is and what it means. I’m still learning, and will continue to learn as Wynter gets older."

无条件的爱的真正含义。打开我的心和我的思想。我能做的比我想象的要多得多。我可以有所作为。”

"To do their research. Reach out to families with children who have Down syndrome! Get the real, true picture. Not just percentages and statistics. Don’t base your choice (if it’s a choice for you) out of fear. Down syndrome is not a scary, awful thing that you need to be afraid of. Don’t allow it to rob you of your joy and excitement about having your beautiful baby! I know every parent deals with their diagnosis differently. Some need to be able to grieve (like I did), because there is to an extent a 'grieving' process. And then there are the parents who embrace the diagnosis completely and don’t bat an eye. There is no right or wrong way to deal with your Ds diagnosis. Yes, there will be delays. Yes, you may face a medical concern. But what I want you to know is that your child is going to open up a whole new big beautiful world to you! It’s a love so great that I hope you will be so lucky enough to experience. I’m literally beaming with pride as I think of Wynter now. She makes me so happy and grateful that she is my daughter. I know how lucky and fortunate we are, and know there are many people who would give anything to have a child just like her."

“啊，多么美好的一天啊!”怀温特之后我只来了一次月经，而且注意到接下来的一个月我就没有来过月经了。但我并不担心，因为我的医生告诉我，在生完孩子后，在它变得更正常之前，它会有一点偏差。但当我连续第二个月没有来月经时，我们决定我需要做一次验孕。温特当时6个月大，当测试结果明确显示“阳性”时，我完全震惊了。我真的停止产奶了。我几乎不敢相信。威尔太兴奋了!我花了一点时间才明白这一点因为我的损失和我和温特的经历。我犹豫着是否让自己对这个消息感到高兴和兴奋。 I knew I would take the early prenatal blood test, but that was mainly to find out the sex of our baby. We knew that I had a higher risk of having another child with Down syndrome, but this did not matter to us. Your chances of having a child with Ds is 1/100 after having given birth to one child with Ds. Whether the test came back positive or negative, it made no difference. We would not do further testing. As long as our baby was healthy, and there were no major medical concerns, that’s all that mattered to us. And in the end, we had an uneventful pregnancy, a healthy, typically developing baby boy who came out after 2 pushes. Literally, after he came out and I was being sewed-up, the delivery nurse was taking my breakfast order."

"Dealing with my postpartum. It came on twice as strong after having Nova. Also, finding our groove with two kids. How to juggle the needs of both? We’re still figuring it out, but we are getting closer. On the positive side, it has been absolutely amazing to see them interact with each other, especially now! Because Nova is older, he’s crawling and his personality is coming out more and more. The best moments have been when I’ve walked in on them giggling and making each other laugh. They have the best laugh. Or Wynter giving Nova hugs and kisses, as he stares at her lovingly. I’ve been lucky enough to capture some pretty sweet moments between the two of them. It absolutely makes my heart melt, and I will cherish them forever."

"Difficult. I was literally pregnant for 2 years in a row! Wynter’s birth was filled with unknowns and we were told she more than likely would be born with a heart defect. During my many cardiologist appointments while I was pregnant with her, they detected a narrowing of her aorta that could possibly cause some breathing problems at birth. Also, with her diagnosis, I wouldn’t be able to do skin-to-skin when she was born. I would only be able to see her briefly and then she would need to be rushed to the ICU. So, we mentally prepared for the worst scenario when she was born. The morning I went into labor with her, it was about 4:30am, I had gotten up to use the bathroom and as I had just gotten back into bed, I felt something wet, I jumped out of bed and water just came gushing out! I was in so much shock and just stood there thinking it would eventually stop. I had only taken 2 birthing classes, and didn’t know what to do. Plus, I wasn’t due for another month! I ended up having to be induced after hours of not dilating, and no progression of being in active labor. I didn’t experience any contractions after my water broke. They needed to get her out before she was exposed to infection. I was so scared, and worried for my baby girl. I went through the gamut of pain relievers after my contractions started. I pushed what felt like forever, and thought I would be forced to have a c-section. But I didn’t, the delivery doctor and nurse were on board with me pushing as long as it was safe for me to do so. Wynter was finally born at just under 6 lbs that evening on August 5, at 9:20pm! After she was born I did experience postpartum anxiety and a little of the 'baby blues,' but it didn’t last long. And after I went back to work and established a good groove with her, I pretty much felt like myself again."

Elena wears a hat by West Perro.">

“诺瓦的诞生非常平淡无奇，也很普通。我实际上已经安排了引产，因为我和他在一起的最后几周非常不舒服。而且他的预产期是12月23日，我不想让他在圣诞节出生。我希望他能有自己的生日，而不必非得和其他重大节日一起庆祝。但在我引产的前一天晚上，我终于自然分娩了，它在第二天12月22日早上8点23分出生了，正好8磅重!吃了诺瓦之后，我的产后焦虑(和抑郁)严重了10倍!直到今天我还在处理这件事。我的焦虑飙升到我的身体和精神反应。如果Nova在哭，而我不能让他停下来，我真的会想捏他!我会有把他摔倒在地的幻觉。 And if both of them were whining/crying at the same time, I would just lose it emotionally and cry hysterically. There were a few desperate phone calls to my husband while he was at work that I know scared him pretty badly. It scared me when I had these episodes! I knew I couldn’t just keep 'dealing with it' and waiting for it 'to pass.' Even though I knew what I was experiencing was normal, I didn’t like it and I needed to acquire some tools to help me deal and cope with it. I’m still a work in progress, but my anxiety is so much better. I now know a few things that help me out of that desperation mode, like taking deep, concentrated breaths, and going outside!"

艾琳娜戴着帽子West Perro.．

DSCBA (Down syndrome Connection of the Bay Area) and NDSS (National Down Syndrome Society) had websites that were extremely informative and helpful. I recently started reading Happy Parents, Happy Kids by Daisaku Ikeda. It gives advice on how you can incorporate and use your Buddhist practice to help with parenting, daily life, and raising a happy child. It’s profound, but also very practical. And Far from the Tree is on my list to read (and on my documentary list to watch). I am very intrigued to see how these families from different walks of life are able to have many things in common, as well as myself. I adored the movie Wonder. It was so thoughtfully done and showed the many sides and perspectives within a family surrounding a child that is 'different,' and in this case one who looked different." ">

“当我怀温特的时候，我在网上做了很多关于唐氏综合症的研究。我发现组织喜欢DSCBA.(唐氏综合症连接湾区)和NDSS（全国唐氏综合症协会）有这样的极其翔实和有益的网站。最近，我开始阅读快乐的父母，幸福的孩子Daisaku Ikeda。它提供了一些建议，告诉你如何将你的佛教实践融入并运用于养育子女、日常生活以及养育一个快乐的孩子。它很深刻，但也很实用。和远离大树在我的阅读清单上(还在吗我的纪录片名单观看）。我非常感兴趣，看看这些家庭如何来自不同的生活，能够拥有许多共同之处的东西和我自己。我崇拜电影想知道．它如此思想地完成并展示了一个家庭内的许多方面和观点，这些家庭在一个“不同”的孩子中，在这种情况下，一个看起来不同的人。“

“我非常尊敬和钦佩很多女性。一个是我妈妈。她克服了生活中的巨大困难。她是力量的真正定义。还有一些非常亲密的女朋友，她们全心全意地拥抱母亲的身份，以如此优雅的方式处理她们的困难时期。我也爱瑟琳娜·威廉姆斯。她公开、坦率地讲述了自己的母亲之旅。因此，我非常尊敬和钦佩她。她有一个巨大的平台，她正利用这个平台来帮助妈妈们赋权，让她们知道她们并不是孤军奋战。”

Elena wears a Han Starnes top, Ace & Jig skirt, and necklace by Zelma Rose.">

“我是由单亲妈妈养大的，她打两份工，晚上去上学(她当时正在攻读护士学位)。她很少出现在我身边，而我就是典型的“挂钥匙的孩子”。我从来没有真正陷入任何麻烦，我太害怕进入任何“危险”或危险的事情。我从小就被教导要独立、自立，并懂得良好职业道德的重要性。当我经历困难的时候，或者为自己感到难过的时候，我的妈妈总会“提醒我”，世界上还有其他人正经历着比我更糟糕的时期，面临着比我更大的挑战。我讨厌她这么做，因为我只想让她为我感到难过!只关心我所经历的一切。我知道她只是想给我一些启发让我对我所拥有的心存感激。但当你还是个孩子的时候，很难这么想。”

艾琳娜穿着汉斯塔尼斯最佳，ACE和JIG.裙子和项链泽尔玛玫瑰．

the best."">

“我希望我能让他们变得自信和独立。但我也希望他们能意识到他人的存在，对他们所拥有的东西有同情心、善良并心存感激。这是我妈妈灌输给我的，我非常珍惜。我也想为我的孩子们做同样的事。我也希望他们能一直感受到爱和支持。在我成长的过程中，妈妈对我并不是很疼爱。我知道这在一定程度上和她的成长环境有关，但我觉得她认为我“还行”。她总是相信，如果她什么都没听到，那一切就都好。我没有因为我妈的为人而对她有消极的看法。随着年龄的增长，这成了一种生活方式，我明白了她为什么会这样。 I love my mom to death, and am grateful for all the sacrifices she has made in order for me to live a better life than she did. It was always us against the world. We were very close. And still are. But I did yearn for that affection from her. And knowing this, I tend to overcompensate with my kids. I give them multiple kisses a day, and maybe even hug them a bit too much, and there is lots of snuggling going on! Their snuggles are的最好的。”

"Open. I’m honestly just wingin' it! I have no clue what I’m doing. I just let the kids guide me, try to listen to my 'motherly instinct,' and to use my best judgement. It’s funny, I thought for sure I would be the strict parent, but turns out I’m the softy. It’s those mama heart strings! They get tugged constantly! For the most part Will and I are on the same page with the kids, there are times I think he does the whole 'tough love' thing at inappropriate times. But my kids are still so young. At this point I just want them to feel secure, confident, and loved. I know the way I approach my parenting style will change as they get older."

“绝对!事实上，它提高了我的意识，并点燃了我采取行动。如果这会影响到我和我的家庭，我就得做点什么!你很容易觉得自己无法做出改变，或者你作为一个人无法创造改变。但事实并非如此。在我的佛教实践中，我们被教导说对话是关键。这就像一块卵石掉进水里，引起涟漪效应。你们是创造鼓舞人心和强大改变的开始。”

“社区意识。当地的艺术家、创意人员和小型企业都对这里充满了爱和支持。有一些非常了不起的人住在这里，他们正在努力创造积极的改变。奥克兰也有一种社会意识。一个灵魂。一个心跳。还有这么多的历史!见证和参与其中是一件很美好的事情。”

“是的，我愿意。我从没在其他地方住过，所以我承认我很好奇。但奥克兰永远是我的家。”

Hawthorn. Laurie is very mindful of the designers she chooses to carry, and we really do carry some great designers, and the best candles by Na Nin! A few other favorites for shopping are Ali Golden, Erica Tanov, and McMullen when I need something a little extra special! For vintage, Pretty Penny, Minds Eye Vintage, Empress Vintage, Mercy Vintage, and definitely the Alameda Flea Market! I’ve met some wonderful vendors like Asa Vintage and Revival Vintage. Temescal Alley here in Oakland is a one-stop shop for me. I can get something for myself, home, and just up the street from the alley is Ruby’s Garden, where I can shop for the kids, and Standard & Strange for my husband. Also shopping at events and pop-ups like West Coast Craft and Bouquet Market are great ways to shop locally and also to discover new designers and makers! Other favorites are Atomic Garden, Morningtide, Crimson, and Neighbor. A few favorite restaurants and cafes are Doña Tomás, Burma Superstar, Sequoia Diner, Julie’s Coffee & Tea, Highwire Coffee at Market Hall, Tacubaya, Iyasare, and I just discovered Millennium! I’m not vegan, but their dishes and drinks are delicious! The drinks could be a bit bigger, but they are very tasty! It just means I have to order a few more! I’m still discovering places to go to be with the kids, and to get outside for a bit. They’re still so young and neither of them are walking yet, so we don’t have as many options when it comes to places that are best for limited mobility. We mostly go to local parks to get some hang time outside. But Berkeley Rose Garden and Morcom Rose Garden are sweet little spots to enjoy a little nature. Also Lake Merritt is great for those who like to get in a good walk or run. Children’s Fairyland, Habitot Museum, Chabot Spade & Science Center, the Oakland Museum, and the Oakland Zoo are all great for kids, but my kids won’t fully appreciate and enjoy these places until they’re a little bit older and walking. There are so many great places to see and enjoy in and around Oakland, it’s hard to name them all!" ">

“有这么多!”当然是我工作的地方，山楂. 劳丽非常在意她选择携带的设计师，我们确实携带了一些伟大的设计师，以及最好的蜡烛Na外祖母！其他一些喜欢的购物方式是阿里黄金，Erica Tanov.，及麦克伦当我需要一些特别的东西的时候!对于古董,一大笔钱，的脑海中，皇后复古，仁慈的，当然还有阿拉米达跳蚤市场！我遇到了一些像Asa Vintage和Revival Vintage这样的美妙供应商。Temescal巷在奥克兰是一家店里的一站式店。我可以为自己，回家和刚从胡同的街道上得到一些东西鲁比花园，我可以为孩子们购物，和标准奇怪对于我的丈夫。也喜欢在活动和弹出窗口上购物西海岸工艺和花束市场是在当地购物的好方法，也可以发现新的设计师和制造商！其他收藏是原子的花园，晨光，深红色的，及邻居. 一些最受欢迎的餐馆和咖啡馆小姐托马斯，缅甸巨星，红杉晚餐，朱莉的咖啡和茶，市场大厅的钢丝咖啡，塔库巴亚，Iyasare，我才发现年！我不是素食主义者，但他们的菜和饮料很美味!饮料可以大一点，但他们非常美味!这意味着我还得再点几份!我还在寻找可以和孩子们在一起的地方，也可以出去走走。他们还很年轻，而且都还不会走路，所以我们没有太多的选择来选择最适合有限流动性的地方。我们通常去当地的公园，在外面消磨时间。但伯克利的玫瑰花园和Morcom玫瑰花园都是享受大自然的好地方。也梅里特湖对于那些喜欢散步或奔跑的人来说非常棒。儿童乐园，Habitot博物馆，Chabot Spade & Science Center，奥克兰博物馆，及奥克兰动物园对孩子来说都很棒，但我的孩子们不会完全欣赏和享受这些地方，直到他们稍微老了。在奥克兰和奥克兰周围有很多伟大的地方，很难称之为所有人！“

Elena wears an Ali Golden dress and Gamma Folk necklace. Nova wears a "Be Kind" t-shirt. Wynter wears Misha + Puff. ">

“舒服。保守。时尚。甚至可能是”复古启发？“我穿着葡萄酒，但我也买了非常复古灵感剪影的碎片。“

埃琳娜穿一个阿里黄金裙子和γ民间项链。诺瓦戴着“善良的”T恤。Wynter Wears.米莎+泡芙．

"Yes and no. I’ve always dressed pretty conservatively. But before I became a mom, I’d say my style was even more feminine. Lots of midi skirts and puff sleeves! I still love both of those things, but maybe just in a more toned-down version."

Ilana Kohn jumpsuits and my Jesse Kamm pants! The jumpsuits are just easy, comfortable, and convenient! It’s one outfit in one, you don’t have to think about putting a top and a bottom together. There’s usually nice deep pockets to hold all your things, especially when you’re wranglin' your kiddos, and need to stash something quickly! And the looser, the better! The Kamm pants just look good! When I want something more form fitting, they are my go-to! I feel confident in them, and the silhouette works perfectly for my body type. I’ve also re-fallen in love with Ace & Jig. I had kinda taken a break from obsessing over them, but their fall/winter ‘16 collection reeled me back in and now I can’t get enough! Prudence top in Ashbury and Capella coat in Sampler, I’m on the hunt for you!" ">

“现在，我只能说我的ilana kohn.连体衣和我的杰希卡姆裤子！Jumpsuits只是简单，舒适，方便！这是一个衣服，你不必考虑将顶部和底部放在一起。通常有很好的深吸口袋来抓住所有的东西，特别是当你是你的小孩的时候，需要快速藏东西！和宽松，更好！kamm裤看起来很好！当我想要更多的形式拟合时，他们是我的去！我对他们有信心，剪影适合我的身体类型。我也爱上了ACE和JIG.．我有点从痴迷于他们休息，但他们的秋冬'16系列收集卷起我，现在我无法得到足够的！谨慎在阿什伯里和海绵拉卡在采样器中，我正在寻找你！“

Studio Abasi in Berkeley. For makeup I use Bare Minerals. It just works for my skin, and I don’t feel like I’m wearing makeup. Though I do wish it wasn’t so messy to apply! I get it everywhere! It drives me nuts!"">

"Simple. I learned my lesson a long time ago that trying lots of different products just doesn’t work for my skin. I use to be the type that had to try them all! Whatever the latest product was that I read about in a magazine or because a friend who had the most perfect skin suggested it to me, I would buy it all! I found what my skin likes and have stuck with the same products for years now. I use the the Solari skincare system created by my esthetician at工作室Abasi.在伯克利。我用的化妆品裸露的矿物质．它只对我的皮肤有效，而且我不觉得我在化妆。虽然我希望申请的时候不要这么乱!我到处都有!它快把我逼疯了!”

“我需要在这件事上做得更好。现在对于健康来说，主要是花时间。我的禅修是我的基础，它帮助我重新集中注意力。还有，选择小睡一会儿。当两个宝宝都在打盹的时候，我总是会利用这段时间来完成“事情”，但现在如果需要的话，我会利用这段时间小睡一会儿。即使只是15分钟。更不用说这还是一个互相依偎的好机会!”

“通常是在我没有整天和孩子在一起的日子。当我丈夫在家而我只想独处几个小时时，我会接受。此外，奶奶们每周来一次，我们有一个相当可靠的保姆，我们可以指望一些周末。我通常用它悠闲地散步，参观一些我最喜欢的商店，和女朋友见面，喝咖啡或吃顿饭，而不必带着它走!我喜欢去跳蚤市场和节俭!实际上，在我去上班的日子里，我认为那是“私人时间”。我可以和女人聊天、交流，在一个平静而美丽的空间里。等我的孩子长大一点，我想独自(或和女朋友)去某个地方旅行，只为自己。”

Hawthorn, a local brick and mortar boutique here in Oakland. I just recently left my partnership/business selling vintage clothing. I needed to concentrate on being a new mama to my son and adjusting to being a mama to two babies under the age of 2! I also wanted to be re-inspired and open to other opportunities that aligned more with what my current passions and cause are."">

“我在学校兼职山楂，当地砖和砂浆的精品在这里奥克兰。我最近刚刚离开我的合作伙伴/业务出售古董衣。我需要集中精力作为一个新妈妈给我的儿子和2岁以下的调整来作为一个妈妈给两个孩子！我也想重新激起和开放更多的，与我现在的心情和事业是结盟的其他机会。”

love that I get to call this place home. I’m open to living somewhere else if that’s where our path takes us, but I know how fortunate I am to be able to still live here. I didn’t go to a traditional college, I honestly didn't feel like I had that privilege to 'go away to college.' My mind frame was that I needed to start working as quickly as I could. I needed to start making money so that I could help my mom out by supporting myself as much as possible. I decided after high school to go to a vocational college, because it was less time, and I would be trained in a skill that would help me get a job quicker. I ended up getting a bachelor’s degree in Design & Visualization at Silicon Valley College, which was basically their graphic design program. I wanted to try and pursue a career in a creative field. Growing up I loved to draw, it was a definite outlet and passion for me. I wonder 'til this day where that love and passion went. Funny enough, I actually didn’t end up using my degree or working in the graphic design field. I was an administrative assistant for a small business in Berkeley for about 12 years after college! Then I became a personal stylist at Anthropologie for about 6 years."">

“我在旧金山湾区出生长大。我没在其他地方住过!我爱我可以把这里称为家我愿意住在其他地方，如果这是我们的道路，但我知道我有多幸运，我还能住在这里。我没有上传统的大学，说实话，我不觉得我有特权“去上大学”。我的想法是，我需要尽快开始工作。我需要开始赚钱，这样我就可以帮助妈妈，尽可能多地养活自己。高中毕业后，我决定上职业学院，因为时间更短，而且我可以接受一种技能的训练，帮助我更快地找到工作。我最终在硅谷学院获得了设计与可视化的学士学位，这基本上是他们的平面设计课程。我想尝试和追求一个创造性领域的职业生涯。从小到大，我喜欢画画，这对我来说是一个明确的出口和激情。直到今天，我都不知道那爱和激情去了哪里。 Funny enough, I actually didn’t end up using my degree or working in the graphic design field. I was an administrative assistant for a small business in Berkeley for about 12 years after college! Then I became a personal stylist at Anthropologie for about 6 years."

“这是我如此热衷于支持当地小企业、购买道德制造的服装和产品以及二手和复古服装的主要原因之一。在Hawthorn，我们有道德的设计师，主要是在美国制造的，而且都是女性!因为店主劳里，我认识了这么多了不起的设计师。她也是一位母亲，所以减少碳足迹对她来说也很重要。了解大规模生产的产品和快速时尚对我们星球造成的服装浪费的负面影响是毁灭性的。我要第一个承认，我喜欢便宜货，经常买快时尚!但我不会穿很长时间，因为质量差，或者太时髦。所以，它们最终会被扔进垃圾桶或捐赠(如果可能的话)。我还是会偶尔在Zara买东西，但我对买什么很挑剔。这件衣服必须是我能穿很长一段时间的，而且我最终还能传给别人。 I sell a lot of my clothing to keep it in rotation and for others to enjoy after I have. I know it may sound corny, but it’s important to me that I do what I can to help the environment so that I set an example for my children, and they learn from my choices. I want them, and many generations after them, to be able to experience and enjoy this wonderful, marvelous planet and all that it has to offer. Buying ethically made products isn’t cheap, but if you can, you should. We all need to start somewhere, right?"

"Yes, I’m definitely starting to build my little village of support. When Wynter was born, I don’t think that was the case as much. It was mainly my husband and my mother and mother-in-law. I definitely felt a little like I was on a deserted island by myself. But I also never asked for, or took help when it was offered. After Nova was born, I learned to put myself out there more, and to reach out a little more. I still have times where it’s hard for me to ask for help, but I feel the friendships I’ve formed especially in the last year have shown me how much people really want to be there for one another. I definitely have a good little mama tribe going. I also use a sitter/nanny once in awhile when she’s available. I’m also getting tremendous support from my special needs parent group I see twice a week. That has been a definite lifesaver!"

“我仍在学习如何平衡这一切。我学到的是，你不能一个人做这件事。你需要别人的帮助和支持。为什么要自己“维护”呢？请求并获得所需的帮助，以便成为最好的自己，从而成为最好的母亲、伴侣、朋友等。”

“是啊!我知道，我希望我能有“该死的妈妈内疚”的态度!但我也认为，当谈到母亲和她们的孩子时，激素/生物因素也会导致“母亲内疚”。尤其是在做母亲的早期。慢慢地，我越来越能放开了。尤其是因为我知道当我能做我自己的事，远离我的孩子时我能成为一个更好的母亲。当我花时间给自己的时候，这让我能够探索和享受我的其他部分，这些部分构成了我这个人。更不用说当我离开我的孩子一天回家，我更感激他们!我很高兴看到它们，抱着它们，和它们玩!这是最好的感觉，我知道他们也感受到了不同。”

“我所做的。怀温特的时候，我请了假，但最终辞掉了工作，成为了一名全职妈妈。当她大约3个月大的时候，我开始在Hawthorn做兼职。在Nova，我暂时休了3-4个月的假，然后回去做兼职。这两次威尔都休了正式的陪产假。这对他非常有帮助，我知道他真的很珍惜那段时间和两个孩子相处。”

For more on Elena, her children, and her work, follow her on Instagram. ">

“为我的激情寻找一个出口。现在我的重点是倡导残疾人社区。传播包容、多样性、宽容和接受的意识。我不希望在广告、电视或社交媒体上看到Ds患者或任何残疾患者是罕见的！我希望它只是一种常态！因为它是！不同能力的人使用相同的产品，穿相同的衣服，吃相同的食物是很正常的！作为美国最大的少数群体之一，残疾人社区应该得到代表和关注！我希望我的女儿能够在广告、商业广告、电影和电视节目中看到自己，因为这是包容和改变观念的起点。这是她如何知道自己和其他人一样被重视和接受的。”

想了解更多关于埃琳娜、她的孩子和她的工作，请跟随她在Instagram．